Good news, fellas! What women really want in a man are qualities any man can develop. For real, even you! 😉
The the even better news is that these are traits every man would feel better about improving regardless of what a woman wants!
If that’s not a win-win, I don’t know what is.
Now, for the skeptics out there who think all women really want a buff Chad with a big… wallet and a lot of power, success or fame, you’re right.
Okay, you’re half right.
Sure, most women appreciate those qualities but — and here’s the kicker — most women don’t need all those things to be happy and horny (for you).
Hypergamy is basically the theory of a person marrying up to the next “level” which can include good looks, money, power, fame etc.
Hypergamy is more pronounced in younger women, especially the “Ashleys” of the world, who are still biologically wired to respond to qualities in a man that produce healthy and well-cared for offspring.
Wait, wait, wait, before you climb that tall bridge, hear me out!
The good news for the every day John is that it’s the personality attributes behind success in any form can be developed by you.
Aside from naturally attractive genetics, it’s actually these traits that are what women really want in a man!
Shut the front door! Am I right?
Yes, of course, some women want it all, but believe it or not, those women are far and few between.
Just like you want it all, but you’d be okay with a gal who gets your motor running; respects and appreciates you, and isn’t too high maintenance.
Am. I. Right??
Watch and learn, my friend, watch and learn!
p.s. Road map to developing the right traits for you: WakeUP2Luv.
p.p.s. Thank you so much for your generous coffee/chocolate donations! ❤️And for buying my memoir!🥰
What Do Women REALLY Want in a Man? (12 PROVEN Traits!)
How to Improve Your Sexual Market Value (at Home)😍 #StayHome and Learn #WithMe!
How to Get a Girl Out of Your League Without Being a Bad Boy (Dating Advice for Shy Guys 2020)
3 Ways to Get a Girl Out of Your League #BossBabe (Dating Advice for Men 2020)
Out of Your League or Low Self Esteem? (Dating Advice for Men 2020)
The reason “nice guys” finish last and good men don’t is because the difference between nice guys and good guys is … self-assurance and intention.
And now here’s a photo of a dolphin …
No, just kidding.
Well, yes, it is a photo of a dolphin, but there’s more to this whole nice-guys-finish-last story.
And if you don’t want to be a single guy waxing his dolphin forever, focus here fellas!
Nice Guys Finish Last because they:
don’t trust themselves enough to have solid opinions
agree with everything she says to be amenable
avoid potential mistakes by not making decisions
have ulterior, selfish motives
Good Guys Come in First because they:
trust themselves enough to have solid opinions and aren’t afraid to share them
disagree with things that don’t align with their beliefs (respectfully)
are confident decision makers because they’ve learned from practicing [making decisions]
are straight-shooters without a hidden agenda (key word: hidden!)
Women prefer good men over nice guys because women want to feel safe, and a man with self-assurance and integrity makes her feel safe.
Let’s analyze …
A woman believes that a man with solid opinions, who can make decisions and disagree when necessary, will be able to “take care of” her, and since women’s primary need is to feel safe—emotionally and physically—his self-assurance goes a long way to achieving that goal—even if he isn’t capable of taking care of her.
Do women need to be taken care of?
In the modern age and in the Western world, not really, but despite feminism, feeling safe is still an innate need.
I don’t know a woman who doesn’t want to feel safe and (at some level) taken care of. Even if she can’t admit it (even to herself).
And this doesn’t mean a man needs bags of money. I’m not necessarily talking about that kind of “taken care of.”
The three most powerful words a man can say to a woman are, “I got this!” Bryan Reeves
Sociology / Biology
Because of sociology and/or biology, women are attuned to the most innocuous feelings of others: we are the (physically) weaker sex, “reading hint” is part of our survival mechanism.
The feminine aspect of (most) women’s nature is far more sensitive to picking up subtle signs of fake niceness over genuine goodness.
When you’re “too nice,” she won’t trust that you’re being honest and real with her and, therefore, aren’t trustworthy!
I’ll tell you right now, fibbers don’t make women feel safe. Nuhuh, no, sir, do not pass go.
Go back to the hand lotion. Back off and whack off, Buster!
But when a man has his own opinions, and especially when he can disagree with her in a kind or even playful way, then she knows he’ll have an opinion when it really counts—like when he has an opportunity to physically protect her or verbally defend her.
Or even when she feels unsure about something and wants his opinion.
How to Go From Nice Guy to Good Man:
Monitor yourself in conversations—with everyone, not just women.
Contemplate how you feel about certain things that you usually simply agree with.
When you discover a conflicting opinion, instead of agreeing with the person, ask questions.
When you get comfy asking questions, offer alternative opinions, “Some people think [this], what do you think?” They may ask for your opinion. Here’s your opportunity to share your take in a non-aggressive way.
Make decisions. If a friends says―Where do you want to eat?―even if you don’t care, offer a suggestion. You can make it easy on yourself by saying what you crave and letting them make the decision, or ask them what they crave and make the decision on where to eat.
Nice Guys Finish Last Takeaways:
Lack of self-assurance comes from lack of practice; lack of practice comes from lack of self-esteem.
Nice = fake. Kind = respectful.
The backbone to my WakeUP2Luv program is a step-by-step what-to-do plan to rewrite your (love) life, inside and outside… because you can read a bazillion blogs on how to build a bicycle, but until you start putting parts together, dude, you ain’t got no ride. 😉
If you enjoyed this blog or know someone who’s got a Costco card for hand cream, please share!
Feeling extra thankful for my work? Buy my memoir or make a coffee donation here. Thank you!
Also, here’s my newest video on nice guys:
And, what the heck, a playlist for y’all Costco shoppers 😉 …
Stop Being TOO Nice! (How to Stop Being Too Nice to Her)
Make Her Want You More and MORE! (12+TIPS!)
ALL Women Are Turned on If You Say “This!” (SURPRISING!)
Setting Boundaries and Dealing with Conflict (Relationship Advice 2020)
How to Deal with Emotional Baggage in Relationships (Dating Advice)
How to Handle Dominant Women (Dating Advice for Shy Men)
Why Women Try to Control Men (Dating Advice for Men)
Biggest Mistake Men Make Chasing Women (Dating Advice for Men)
Nice Guy Syndrome / Stop Being Too Nice / Avoid the Friend Zone! (Dating Advice for Men 2020)
How to be a Good Bad Boy (Dating Advice for Men 2020)
No More Mr Nice Guy by Robert Glover #1: What is Nice Guy Syndrome? (Connor Beaton ManTalks)
No More Mr Nice Guy by Robert Glover #2: Types of Nice Guys (Connor Beaton ManTalks)
No More Mr Nice Guy by Robert Glover #3 Nice Guy Syndrome & Porn Addiction (Connor Beaton ManTalks)
No More Mr Nice Guy Robert Glover Pt 4: Nice Guy Syndrome When to Have Sex (Connor Beaton ManTalks)
No More Mr Nice Guy Robert Glover #5 Nice Guy Syndrome Guys Need Friends (Connor Beaton ManTalks)
When you connect with someone online while in isolation, you have an excuse to establish emotional intimacy.
You can share your experiences, let down your barriers and learn about the other person.
This is a COMMUNICATION GOLDMINE for new and existing relationships.
Talk and connect from the comfort of home. (You can do the next part of my alpha plan for post-covid dating at home, too!).
Get your performance back!
Okay, I saved the best for last. Acoustic Wave Therapy is something I want every guy out there to get up to speed on – total game changer.
Let’s be honest, you’re not getting younger. All of those trips around the sun (and to the fridge) can hit below the belt.
For dudes this means that your circulatory system isn’t what it was in your teens.
Heart health is always important, but if you’re having circulation issues, getting hard is going to be harder than it needs to be.
Micro-plaque builds up in your blood vessels. It’s kind of like forgetting to change the oil in your car – things are going to break down faster and performance takes a hit.
You’ll want a bat made from the finest wood to hit home runs when the stadium lights come back on.
Acoustic Wave Therapy gently breaks up plaque to restore blood flow and stimulate neovascularization (creation of new, healthy vessels) – helping you get back to your peak sexual performance.
You can head to a clinic and pay thousands of dollars for a course of treatments, or you can follow this link to learn about The Phoenix and save a ton of money.
Do your own tune up from the comfort of home (or anywhere else) and skip the awkward doctor’s office chat.
I want you to own this chapter of your life. Commit to healthy habits, dial in your dating profiles, connect and learn about your partner in an emotionally authentic way and seriously – make sure your cock-a-doodle-do is ready to welcome the morning sun.
With the combustive election cycle heading into high gear, you have to be living under a rock to avoid the topic of politics.
In fact, not having an opinion can hurt your chances of finding a date or a romantic partner, according to a new report from OkCupid.
The site reports that politics continues to be the top deal-breaker in dating, with 76% of singles saying how their date leans is vital to them.
According to the OkCupid Voter 2020 report, 500,000 people responded they could not date someone who didn’t vote, with 85% of registered voters more likely to receive a message from a potential date, and 63% of registered voters more likely to get matched.
“Now more than ever, daters want to connect with people who share their values,” says Ariel Charytan, OkCupid’s CEO. “We have always empowered people to match on what matters to them, and our millions of daters across the United States overwhelmingly prioritize civic engagement when it comes to finding someone they are compatible with.”
RELATED:Love at the Polls: Close to 90% Won’t Date Someone Who Didn’t Vote
To help single daters during this gut-wrenching and unprecedented time, OkCupid has created a new voter badge that will automatically be added to members’ profiles if they answer the question, “Are you registered to vote in the 2020 election?”
This voter badge shows you care about this divisive country we’re living in. By including this badge, along with a previously released badge for Black Lives Matter displayed on your profile, is, in my opinion, a magnet for love.
Singles who say they aren’t registered to vote will soon be redirected to a page on OkCupid in partnership with “When We All Vote,” to register to vote in real-time. The WWAV initiative was launched by Michelle Obama, Tom Hanks, Lin Manuel-Miranda, and Janelle Monae, among others, to help singles register to vote in the 2020 election.
Love is at stake, and now is the time to show your values to connect with someone during this critical and historic election.
If the pandemic and civil unrest haven’t widely opened your eyes, perhaps OkCupid’s state-by-state interactive map will show how singles feel about serious issues of families separated at the border, prison reform, climate change, and stricter gun control. At least they’ll give you topics of conversation to discuss when you match with your date.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you swipe and roam leading to election day.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert. She’s the author and creator of Love in the Age of Trump: How Politics is Polarizing Relationships, and has been helping singles navigate love for over 25 years.
On NBC Today in LA, I was a guest with Daniella Guzman and Jonathan Gonzalez to talk about quarantine love and Dating in the Age of COVID-19: How to Find Love in a Pandemic.
I explained why dating is a hot topic in a pandemic, and where singles originally pushed the pause button; Not anymore.
Here’s an excerpt from our interview.
Daniella: The pandemic has put a hold on a lot of things, including dating, in person. Singles are heading to dating apps and websites to meet new people.
Jonathan: Dating is hard enough as it is. Haveyou seen more people turning to dating apps during this time?
Julie: I have. As a matter of fact, the numbers have really skyrocketed! I have an ongoing poll on my site, DatingintheAgeofCOVID19.com, with the question, how has COVID-19 changed your dating life?
The majority, 83% said they were looking for a meaningful relationship more than ever, with less than 3% looking to hook up.
Daniella: So how does this work? You start with a Zoom meeting, and what’s your suggestion on how this works to date during the pandemic?
Julie: We do go in stages, and I’m a big fan of virtual dating. I created something called the Dress Rehearsal, where I actuallygo on “mock date” with people to get them ready for their date.
I check their lighting and what they’re wearing. As you can see I’m wearing red, and red pops on a video video date.
We start slowly, with the first date being just a virtual drink. So I suggest bringing something bubbly, and putting on something that you’d wear if you were going to meet for happy hour, and do come with a happy face.
Daniella How can people stay safe if they do choose to finally make that next step and meet in person?
Julie: Right now, I’m not recommending meeting in person. I believe you’re better off safe at home, having virtual dates and doing fun thing for each other; sending deliveries.
I know some people send Venmo payments so they can pick up the tab from for their date’s dinner from their favorite restaurant.
Do things that are actually fun. Take a painting class together.
Start thinking about things you might want to do when the coast is clear to meet up in person.
Daniella: It can get really lonely. This is a really good way, if not anything, to make a new friend as well. But, there are risks involved, always.
How can users make sure the person they’re talking to is the same person as their profile pictures. Does it make it more difficult when you don’t see that person?
Julie: This, Daniella, is the reason I believe in virtual dates. Whether you’re using Skype or Zoom or FaceTime, here’s an opportunity to make sure that someone’s not a “catfish.’ If their profile photos look a certain way, and then you get on a date or hop on a call, and they’re not recognizable, well, they’re probably hiding a lot more than just old photos.
Jonathan: Thank you Julie Spira for joining us today. You can find Julie on Instagram @JulieSpira and on her website at CyberDatingExpert.com.
The post Dating During the Pandemic – Julie Spira on NBC Today in LA appeared first on Cyber Dating Expert.
Make Her Want You More and More… Yes, you can make her want you more but there’s a caveat and you may not like it. Certain conditions need to apply to be able to make her want you or you’re just wasting your time, heart, loot and energy. So, if she doesn’t at least have […]
The post Can You Make Her Want You More? appeared first on Dating Coach for Men.
Most of us are too excited to plan a wedding and forgot that there are a lot more things to do before exchanging your vows. A wedding is one day, but a marriage is the rest of your life. Thus it is important for you to learn how to prepare yourself for marriage.
Marriage is an institution that changes the lives, lifestyles, and responsibilities of a woman forever. We learn how to make changes to incorporate the one important person and make them a priority in our lives.
Dedicating yourself to someone else for the rest of your life is a serious business. It needs your personal commitment, love, dedication, and hard work to keep survive. That is why you should plan for a marriage and not just for a wedding.
Sounds like a lot of work? Well, it is. The wife is genuinely the soul of the marriage and no relationship can be completely successful without her love.
How To Prepare Yourself To Be A Good Wife In Marriage?
Getting ready for marriage doesn’t have to be overwhelming, make it simple but significant. You can try to have this mindset, just as you want a good husband, your husband also wants a good wife.
But what is the real meaning of a good wife? Well, it may not what you think it is.
Modern, progressive women may have a though time to accept the idea of a ‘good wife.’ Because the normal answer they got from the term ‘good wife’ is to know how to clean the house, take care of the kids, and always look your best for your husband.
But it’s no longer necessary nowadays. In this article, we will explore the different ideas and qualities that you need to become a good wife in your own term.
1# Be a supportive partner.
Being a supportive partner can mean a lot to your future husbands. Be it a career, a hobby, or anything else that your husband pursues, he will need your support. Remember the quotes, “behind every successful man, there is a woman,” or “A man with dreams needs a woman with a vision.” So be that woman.
Be a supportive wife also mean that you need to appreciate him, push him, and praise him when he achieves a milestone or tries something new. It is about encouraging him to improve or offering constructive criticism in whatever he is doing.
If you are able to provide your partners with emotional fulfillment by being supportive, you will create a new depth of love in your relationship and create a better future.
2# Learn to serve
I strongly believe that, if you want to be happy in your marriage, you need to serve each other. A husband has what his wife needs and a wife also has what her husband needs. That is how God designed marriage, for us to serve each other.
“Don’t demand change from others before you change yourself.”
If you want your partner to serve you after marriage, maybe you could be the first one who set up the example. If you manage to start doing those things yourself, you’ll begin to see that your partner also start to follow your direction.
Read more: How To Cherish Your Spouse
3# Show of your cooking skill
Remember the old adage, ‘The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.’ But some of you might be skeptical about this, especially if both of you are working. You think that both of you should share this responsibility, women are not the only ones who need to cook.
Well, that’s fair enough. But my point is when it comes to your turn to prepare the meal, use the opportunity to win his heart. Food is one of the ways to show someone that you care for them. Spend some time to learn about his favorite dishes.
Men always believe that dished prepared from their partner is filled with love.
4# Learn to respect
Men crave for respect and honor, while women look for love and romance. I still remember after years of marriage with my husband, I ask him this question, “Between love and respect, which one you require more?”
And his answer surprised me: “Respect.”
Then I found out men said they would rather feel unloved than disrespected. God gave men a special deep need for respect. They naturally want people to respect him, especially from their partner.
Your respect makes him believe that he can do hard things, protect you from danger, take care of the family, and reduces his fear of failure. Your respect also encourages him to be a good leader to your family in the future.
5# Learn more about man’s hero instinct
Men are born with this immature instinct. They want to be a hero in their woman’s eyes. Psychologically, this instinct is about their satisfaction and their desire to feel important. They want to show how useful, strong, and effective he is among his peers.
This natural instinct already shows up when they are still a kid. You can clearly see the signs of a hero when you look at the boy’s interest, they want to be a Superman, Batman, Ironman, and more. They want to save the world and protect the one they love.
So your task is to learn how this hero instinct affects your relationship. If you are interested to learn more about this, check out my other post: How to tackle your man’s hero instinct.
6# Work on your appearance
Try to work on your appearance, so that even after your marriage, you still make the same effort to care for yourself. You can be your own kind of beautiful, you can be more attractive to your future husband, your marriage is worth looking your best.
Take care of your basic hygiene. Shower every day, keep your hair clean and smell nice, take care of your teeth, and shave everything that needs shaving. Wear clean clothes and throw away clothes that make you look homeless.
Practice this as your new habit, it will be much easier for you to maintain your appearance after marriage.
7# Be prepare for the changes
Marriage will change your life, so be ready for all the ups and downs of your marriage journey. First, there is no place for selfishness in a marriage. You should start changing your mindset from ‘me’ to ‘we.’ Be more considerate to your partner when you making a plan or make an important decision.
Apart from that, you also need to shift from handling your own finance as a single to managing household finance together. You may need to share your wealth together with your spouse. If you are a working woman, be open about your salary, debt, and investment.
Having an open discussion with your spouse will help you maintain a healthy relationship and prevent any conflicts in the future. The two of you need to be on the same team, so you should learn how to become a good team player.
8# Keep an open mind and be flexible
You and your future husband might have different ways of thinking, perspective, desire, and needs. There is no way you can be on the same page all the time. You shouldn’t expect everything to be perfect in marriage.
Things happen, and sometimes it beyond your expectation. So prepare yourself to be more adaptable. As long as both of you keep an open mind and be flexible to each other, you can minimize the problem in your married life.
The best marriages are made up of individuals who serve each other for the sake of their relationship. They weight their spouse needs over their own and they do that wholeheartedly. I hope this article helps you to prepare for the marriage.
If you have any point that you want to highlight, feel free to leave your comment below. I would love to hear your ideas.
Author at TheUglyFact.com
Joyce Hue an author, creative content manager and loving mother. In her spare time, she loves to read books, cook delicious meals, go travel and shopping! She loves blogging because this is the way to share her thoughts.
Women Get Turned on When You Say “This” (For Real) Do ALL women get turned on when you say “this?” or is this just click bait, Anna? Ok, seriously, I’m not pulling your leg, all quality women get turned on when you say “this,” I promise. What woman doesn’t qualify as a quality woman? Glad […]
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